‘THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON’ review

‘THE TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON’ review

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The Twilight Saga is just something not for me – a middle-aged white male. This series is for teenage girls and it concerns the angst-ridden relationship between Edward the vampire and Bella the girl of his fancy. Even though he is 109 years old, he still has that Hugh Hefner ability to land the young flesh. The first film in this series was a monster event of last Winter, and my #1 vote for the worst film of the year. I hated just about every frame of that film to the point of making apologies to my date. As a matter of fact, she refused to attend the screening of the second adventure titled New Moon.

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The film picks up where the last one left off. Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward (Robert Pattinson) are still in platonic love, staring longingly into each other’s eyes. She wants to be a vampire and he refuses to turn her. He feels himself a damned soul and doesn’t want to give the woman he loves the same fate. As the opening spools, she has been having dreams of rescuing him. Edward has realized that it has become too dangerous for the vampire clan in the little town. The family must move, and he tells her that she will never see him again. Shrieking sobs are heard from the audience. Edward soon becomes a misty spirit in the mind of Bella. Or is he some manifestation to keep her safe?

The deep longing looks and morose dialogue between Bella and Edward are replaced in her world by Jacob (Taylor Lautner), the local Native American who just can’t keep a shirt on (much to the shrieking delight of the teen girls in the audience). Bella soon finds that when she puts herself in danger, she sees the Edward manifestation. She becomes a thrill junkie, riding on the back of high speed sport bikes and getting Jacob to build a motorcycle for her to ride. Then one day, Jacob isn’t to be found. When Bella finally confronts him, he’s cut his long hair and running with a pack of half-naked boys. He tells Bella that she must never see him because he has promised to protect her. The angst and the mystery deepen. Even the title New Moon gives away the secret that the new beau is a wolf in no sheep’s clothing, just a werewolf. The basic story here is the realization of how Edward is still a part of Bella, even when she is building a relationship with another. It is also of how unrequited love drives the forces of both good and evil.

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There are massive breaches of logic, like why do the werewolf boys have to run around shirtless but not pant-less. With the PG-13 rating, the makers couldn’t do that, but it makes no narrative sense. The physical transformations of man to wolf happen so fast that they make the torture of An American Werewolf in London seem as quaint as the Wolfman films felt to the 1970’s audience.

The film does have some interesting aspects that were touched on in the narrative. The treaty between the werewolves and the vampires is an engrossing starting point for some future plots. The vampire royalty and the council in Italy are both some unexplored elements that could be a rich source of exploration. This entry delves much further into elements of a grand scale that will save all the moon-eyed pathos.

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The basic thing I don’t get is the attraction of Bella to every supernatural being on the planet. All the vampires and werewolves want this good young lass, but the question is why they are attracted to this little white girl. There is nothing in her performance or demeanor that would drive one man crazy, let alone all men crazy. The story between Jake and Bella is much more interesting than the one with Edward.

There are many references to Romeo and Juliet throughout the entire exercise. That is a perfect description of the series. It is not Shakespearean in scope but it does follow that reference to teen angst. With lines like “A little poison, a dagger to the heart, so many options” are chuckle worthy in a teen pathos sort of way. It’s a forlorn romance where the principles never see each other, but long for the vision that is inside their heads.

A great way to describe this soap opera called New Moon is to call it “The Young and the Hairless”. If you are a girl you will just have to SEE IT because IT IS IMPORTANT, but for the adults it’s a little trifle of whimsy. In the end, New Moon is much better than the first one, and an interesting set-up for further adventures.

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